lt　a　masquerader。　I　had　been　in　uniform　a　long　time　and　I　missed　the　feeling　of　being　held　by　your　clothes。　The　trousers　felt　very　floppy。　I　had　bought　a　ticket　at　Milan　for　Stresa。　I　had　also　bought　a　new　hat。　I　could　not　wear　Sim's　hat　but　his　clothes　were　fine。　They　smelled　of　tobacco　and　as　I　sat　in　the　partment　and　looked　out　the　window　the　new　hat　felt　very　new　and　the　clothes　very　old。　I　myself　felt　as　sad　as　the　wet　Lombard　country　that　was　outside　through　the　window。　There　were　some　aviators　in　the　partment　who　did　not　think　much　of　me。　They　avoided　looking　at　me　and　were　very　scornful　of　a　civilian　my　age。　I　did　not　feel　insulted。　In　the　old　days　I　would　have　insulted　them　and　picked　a　fight。　They　got　off　at　Gallarate　and　I　was　glad　to　be　alone。　I　had　the　paper　but　I　did　not　read　it　because　I　did　not　want　to　read　about　the　war。　I　was　going　to　forget　the　war。　I　had　made　a　separate　peace。　I　felt　damned　lonely　and　was　glad　when　the　train　got　to　Stresa。

At　the　station　I　had　expected　to　see　the　porters　from　the　hotels　but　there　was　no　one。　The　season　had　been　over　a　long　time　and　no　one　met　the　train。　I　got　down　from　the　train　with　my　bag；　it　was　Sim's　bag；　and　very　light　to　carry；　being　empty　except　for　two　shirts；　and　stood　under　the　roof　of　the　station　in　the　rain　while　the　train　went　on。　I　found　a　man　in　the　station　and　asked　him　if　he　knew　what　hotels　were　open。　The　Grand…Hotel　&　des　Isles　Borrom閑s　was　open　and　several　small　hotels　that　stayed　open　all　the　ye